Dr. Huxtable, where are you???

On Tuesday Riaz and I went to my first appointment with the new OBGYN. Touted as "the best in the city" by various sources, I had high expectations of this doctor which were, of course, crushed fairly soon after waiting 45 minutes with Lua in the lobby just to get into the exam room - where I had to wait 20 more. I don't want to sound overly negative about this woman, I'm sure she is an excellent physician and I would be in good hands if I ever needed any serious medical interventions. However, seeing a healthy, normal pregnant woman didn't seem to rate high on her list of priorities. Dr. X was in the room with us for all of seven minutes. She unceremoniously plopped me on the table, pulled the top of my pants down and talked loudly over the first sounds I will ever hear my baby make - his/her heartbeat (which I got to listen to for approximately 15 seconds). When Riaz asked her how many beats per minute the heartrate should be - remembering that the midwife that we had with Lua always timed them and told us they were in the normal range - Dr. X explained that she was so experienced that she didn't need to time the heartrate. She just KNEW. Okay, whatever. So here's the deal, and it's really at the crux of all this ranting and raving. What ever happened to the Dr. Huxtables of the world? Where are those doctors who will see you from zygote to full-term baby and then actually show up, possibly in their pjs, for the delivery? I mean, even if I see Dr. X for every one of my prenatal visits (which, by the way, she deemed unnecessary to schedule for another two months), the reality is that she will probably not be the one to attend the delivery. In fact, the actual delivery will probably be done by a resident unless I specifically request an MD (which Dr. X was not supposed to tell me, but did). Are you getting tired of all the parenthesis yet? Cause I'm not done! As you can tell, I was quite disheartened after my visit with Dr. X and I started thinking about the midwife that I saw for my prenatal visits with Lua. Let's call her Ann. She was great. Really sweet, competent, thoughtful. I always felt like she was listening to my concerns and she made me feel like my (relatively normal) pregnancy was still interesting and deserved attention. You might be wondering why I decided not to go with her again, and the answer is simple: she did not deliver my baby. There are eight midwives working in this practice and they rotate so that whoever is on call is the one delivering the baby - no Huxtables here either. The woman who ended up being there was very nice but evidently inexperienced because she screwed up on the "repair" work after the delivery and it caused me a lot of pain and several extra months of recovery time. SO not wanting to go through that again, I decided to go with an MD and here we are.

DEEP BREATH. I am sure you are all ready for me to finish this post so I will appease you just this once. I decided to call Ann the midwife today to see if she had any suggestions for me. She told me that although she understood my concern, she felt it was a shame to give up the whole midwife experience (which includes extra time and attention in prenatal visits and a midwife attending you throughout the entire delivery) just for fear of the repair going badly at the end. She told me that I could go with the midwives and still request a doctor to do the repair work if I wished, and that she would talk to Dr. X to see what she thought about it. Dear, blessed Ann also said that she has occasionally come in to be there for a patient's delivery even if she wasn't on call and that she would be willing to do that for me although she couldn't promise (since she has small children at home and her husband works a demanding job as well). The only hitch is that the midwife I had last time who screwed up is still working there, so if for some reason I ended up in labor and she was the only one on call (and Ann couldn't be there), I would have to feel comfortable with that. So now I guess I have some thinking to do. I do feel a lot better about the whole thing though, even though it's not perfect. Healthcare is complicated, no?

My dear one

Tomorrow Riaz and I will be married for three years. In other words, three years ago I made the best decision of my life. I thank God every day that I was foolish enough to go through with marrying this man who I’d only known for nine months, who grew up in a different country, who was absolutely passionate about things I couldn’t care less about (i.e. computers, speakers, and crazy ideas like polyphasic sleep patterns). Riaz is the best man I have ever known, and I am unbelievably proud to have him by my side.

There are so many things I have learned from my husband in the past three years…unfortunately almost none of them have a thing to do with sound waves or gigabytes (although it’s not for lack of trying on his part). Riaz has taught me how to sacrifice. He has taught me about generosity, humility, passion, selflessness, and love. Most of all, he has taught me what it means to be a real husband and father.

So, cheers to us on our third anniversary. I can’t wait to give my husband a kiss on our thirtieth. I love you, honey. Thank you for all you do.

Full of Frost

Cold as...

Well whatever I said before about feeling spring in the air, I take it back. This morning we woke up to 9 inches of snow and it was still coming down. The power was out in our area of Minneapolis, and Riaz couldn't get out of the parking lot with his little Ford Focus. It was a mess. When I called the power company, they said that the power wouldn't be back on until 6am tomorrow morning! Angel paced the floor for most of the morning. We usually listen to music or talk radio in the mornings, and then at 10:00 we watch Sesame Street. None of that today. Actually, Mondays are the days we go to her class at school but unfortunately that was out of the question today. I was most nervous because Angel has been refusing to take naps lately until 3 or 4 in the afternoon and I didn't know what I was going to do with her all day with no break and no distractions. Pretty pathetic, huh? I realize that I would be no good in a little house on the prairie. Thankfully Angel fell asleep at her old nap time of 11:00 and slept until 1:45. It was like a little blessed miracle. Right after she woke up the power was restored! We still didn't make it out of the house today but I was just happy we didn't freeze to death since the heat started dwindling when our power went out. Maybe tomorrow we can have a little fun, rolling around in the snow.

Lions and Tigers and Angels

Today is a great day. The last couple weeks have been hard - I was sick and spent 90% of the last week in bed - but today I woke up feeling refreshed. Hooray for over-the-counter interventions! I got out of bed, got breakfast ready for Angel and I, and bounced around the kitchen talking to Angel in a happy voice. She must have taken the hint because she sat in her highchair without complaint and ate every one of her cheerios and an entire banana without letting a single thing fall on the floor. I got us both undressed and turned the shower on, and I began to regale Angel with stories about the beach. I told her about hot weather (I doubt she remembers what it feels like), and the shore, and swimming, and sand. I started to daydream about taking my little family camping this summer. It will be so fun to see Angel experience the outdoors again - really for the first time since she couldn't do much last year but watch. I decided I had some serious spring fever so I took Angel to the Zoo and the Conservatory. I was a little apprehensive about doing this because typically Angel will not sit still in her stroller when I am around. She wiggles and whines and then she screams and throws her body against the food tray. Unfortunately she is getting too heavy for me to pick up all the time now, so carrying her everywhere is no longer an option.

When we arrived at the Conservatory, Angel lived up to her (fake) name. She was truly angelic all morning long. She sat in her stroller peacefully as we strolled past flowers, plants, trees, and fountains. The heavenly sent of warm, moist foliage invaded our nostrils at every turn. I gulped in this scent like it was water I and I was stranded in the desert. Actually, it was more like it was greenery and I was stranded in Minnesota. I remember when I was pregnant with Angel, and I would have an experience like this. If I noticed a really remarkable smell, I would breathe it in as deeply as I could and then tell her about it. "Baby," I would say, "this is the smell of the sea", or "this is a rose", or "this is your daddy's cologne. This is what Daddy smells like". I did this again today, as I breathed in and imagined the new little life inside of me could smell just what I was smelling. I don't know if this is true, but it seems that little fetuses are so perceptive about their mother's eating habits, smoking habits, and can even react to their thoughts and feelings. Why not smells? Oh, did I mention I am pregnant? I don't really know who reads this blog but probably most of you who do already know this news. For those who didn't...well...surprize!

So after we had wheeled ourselves around all of that living plant life, we traveled outside to see the animals. Angel was so damn cute it made me want to kiss her toes. When she saw an animal, her little mouth would transform into an "O" shape and her eyes would grow wide. She stared for a long time, and then she waved. She waved and waved at the animals, expecting them to respond in kind. When they didn't, she would get fed up and point back to the walkway like, "Mama, this one's lame. Let's go see the next one". At one point, I let her out of the stroller to walk around and she went up to each of the little kids she saw, looked right in their eyes, and waved. If she didn't get a wave back, she would follow them around, waving, until I pulled her away. Sometimes Angel is like a silent movie, waving and pointing and signing her words. I wonder when she will start to talk. I can't wait to see what she has to say for herself.